Three Pears, three pairs, 3 X 2=6, threesome times two, six-tom, sex-a-ton, burn calories, hunger, pear, two more, and that makes three pears.

This is my brain:

Friday, January 7, 2011

13000 words

Bestowed upon me on my most recent birth celebration was a real camera (that's its main functionality). Thus, great moments captured via my iPhone have been scarce. So extremely scarce in fact, I expect their demand to fiercely overpower gold, oil, and cookies any day now. In times of great change and sorrow (new Starbucks logo), I can't bear keeping these marvels from you any longer. This is... the 6th edition of my life in iPhone photos. This time, I even took pictures of  unsuspecting strangers. Why isn't Apple paying me yet?

Da na na na na, Inspector Gadget. Always have your shoes match your briefcase full of money and Barbie hair. 

This - apart from learning about Spermache  - is the reason I am taking Psychology. This shits peer reviewed! 

Plastic geometric step humping dog, "Welcome Customers!"

Favorite buy of the year: Zombie at Tiffany's t-shirt. I think Breakfast at Tiffany's Brains could have also been a good title, with Holly Go-nob-om-num-snifff-lighty.

Tony, the regal house cat. Could be a children's anime show. 

The outcome of letting my boyfriend touch my circle scarf. The most offensive part: His Movember rat stace. 

My favorite mountain, solely because it looks like an Iguana lying in the sun. 

Boyfriend's last name is Woods. He would have bought it too, except for the fact that I prefer he didn't smell like a suburban high school boy at a party. 

I Love Alberta Cow Butt. Also, I more recently said "Stop squeezing my boobs, I'm not a cow!" 

Should have read: I am in danger of drowning. I am not in a river. I am potentially having an orgasm. I am unattractive when I open my mouth like that. I am unaware that this picture is being taken.
Let's celebrate, in comparison to this ad campaign, the Bow River is gorgeous. 

Sequence: 1) Decide to take a break at work 2) Look down at this exact spot 3) Laugh uncontrollably 4) Take picture 5) Address office mate's concern for my sanity 6) Eat the Kit Kat during my break 7) Wish someone was willing to do the "Give me a break" clap with me 8) Return to work in a melancholic state

I don't know what is sadder. That they aren't identical twins and they look like this, or that they are and they still dress the exact same. 

Most likely an Asthma doctor right? ;)

Scarcity is scary. 

3 comments:

  1. oh goodness, these are great! I'm so bad about taking pictures of unsuspecting strangers. :\ I love the Zombie shirt, so much! Where did you get it?

    ReplyDelete
  2. I got it from this store called Nation at the art center in Calgary. Its one of those really great 1/20 pieces made deals. It's also the place where I get all of my plastic art toys. I think you'd really like a lot of the more morbid ones. Check it out!
    http://thisisnation.com/

    Also, you should feature your unsuspecting stranger pictures!! :D

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'll check it out! Thanks. :] I always want to post up my pictures. First I should blur out their faces or something, so I dont feel *too* bad. haha.

    ReplyDelete